The balance between school work and activities

Hayley’s looking forward to the Christmas holidays after a demanding term in her final school year, while Tiger Mother is encouraging her to cut back on out of school activities.

Saturday morning, elbow deep in revision diaries and the family calendar

Hayley’s counting down the days until the end of term, getting more excited with every little chocolate reindeer that falls out of the windows in her advent calendar. It’s an exciting time evidently, Christmas, even for a 16-year-old – long may it last, I say.

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It’s also been quite intense at school so she’s looking forward to the holidays. The fact is it’s her final year at school – I can’t believe I’m saying it! – and the pace is hotting up. Lots of hard work is required. And earlier this month they started their mocks, which was quite a shock for her as the realisation hit how much effort is needed to succeed in next year’s GCSEs.

“Hayley’s got to knuckle down this school year”

Hayley’s got to knuckle down this school year and that means dropping – albeit very reluctantly – some of the many and varied out of school activities she usually does. There’s been a fair bit of wrangling over exactly what she can still fit in without it affecting her school work.

I’ve always encouraged her to take part in everything going – Guides, sports clubs, air cadets, work. She struggles socially due to her deafness and social communication difficulties, and having structured activities to go to has really paid off; it’s done her a power of good in terms of confidence, self-esteem and just learning about the world and how to be in it. It’s also equipped her with experience that might help her get a job in the future. But now there’s got to be a compromise between fun/experience and nose to the grindstone studying.

“Leadership experience will help her personal self-development”

She dropped Guides – easy because she was too old at 16. Ditto the local youth enterprise scheme, which gave her four hours’ paid work a week. But she is looking for a Saturday job, doing tennis every Monday and still going to air cadets twice weekly, though that’s under review. And now she’s decided to try Explorers, the follow-on from Guides and Scouts, which involves doing one night a week plus an extra evening as a young leader for Cubs. I can see the value of it though, as well as the fun. Leadership experience will help her personal self-development and possibly boost her job chances in the future.

“She’s not strong academically”

It’s just trying to decide together how far to tip the balance. She’s not strong academically, so has to try harder to get the minimum grades. But there again…

Aaargh, I don’t know!

Hopefully she’ll soon see for herself she can’t do it all and drop some activities of her own accord, it’ll be better if it happens that way. And I can always remind her about the NDCS Young Leaders courses next summer, which have an accredited leadership certificate – GCSE exams will all be over bar the shouting by then, so she’ll be able to throw herself into it to her heart’s content.

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